Last year I chose the word “Deliberate” as my theme for the year. Honestly, it was probably one of my most successful ventures last year – simply being deliberate about how I invest my time and energy and heart. It wasn’t without struggles or a good dose of failure, but I am happy to have grown in my ability to be deliberate. To ponder and consider the ramifications before leaping in. This is big for me. As a result, I felt less trapped, more free to do the things that I was supposed to do and not all the things other people expected or hoped I would do. It was another excellent opportunity to learn again how good healthy boundaries are and to practice them in many areas of my life (with more or less success). I’m not pretending this is something I accomplished on my own, but rather I think it was God’ wanted to do in me and He faithfully led me in the quest. As always, His plan is perfect and the more we cooperate, the more peace and joy we experience.
For this coming year, the word “authentic” keeps coming to mind. I’m not exactly sure what that means other than probably being more forthright, less willing to disappear in the face of tension, and more willing to embrace who I am in the midst of the messiness of life. It is funny because I think I am pretty authentic already, but that is most true in circumstances where I am comfortable and loved. I tend to shrink back and try to blend in with the wallpaper when it is less comfortable. I’m not exactly sure where this is headed, but I think it is going to be an interesting ride.
Yesterday as I was praying about what God wants to do in my life this year, the scripture that resounded in my heart was simple: “Do whatever he tells you” – John 2:5. The setting was the wedding at Cana, the wine had run out. Mary asks Jesus to help and says confidently to the servants “Do whatever he tells you.” There is so much faithful confidence in that line. I won’t pretend there isn’t some trepidation when that is your scripture to ponder and grow in, but I trust that God knows what He is about. Pray for me.